Massaman Curry with Roasted Brussel Sprouts

I love curry. Thai, Indian, Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Vietnamese, Caribbean - I live for that shit. This is a dish that I had a lot growing up. My mother made this for us all the time, and that was not based on its simplicity, at all. Rather, we all just fucking loved this dish. It can be a big task, especially considering you make the curry paste yourself; but trust me when I saw, the payoff is huge.

This is a recipe from a British chef duo named the Hairy Bikers (Yes. They are hairy, and they ride motorbikes). Here is a link to the recipe on the BBC website:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/thai_massaman_chicken_82428

^^^ Not the actual Hairy Bikers

When going through this recipe, there are a few things to bear in mind; some of the ingredients are not the easiest to get ahold of. Don't worry, I will offer you alternatives. Also, what's good to know is that this curry is very customizable, and very easy to improvise with and adapt to suit your palate.

Also, I know it can seem like a pain in the arse to make your own paste. I mean, seriously, they sell cans of the shit in stores, why not just get one of them? You could, and the curry will be, well, fine. But are we really gonna settle for fine? Unless of course we're saying it like 'Damn Jordan, this curry is fine as hell'. Plus, part of the joy of this recipe is cooking it from scratch. Like, scratch scratch. Obviously we can't make our own fish sauce but, come on, making our own curry paste? That's pretty fucking impressive - take pride in your creation, own it. fucking feel yourself. I use that curry paste to gain my neighbours' affection and friendship. It's a talking point! It sounds cool as shit to say you make your own curry paste. You want some of my curry paste? Sure! I make it in batch and freeze it, ain't no thing. (And yes, I definitely suggest making the paste in batch, because then you do it once, and you have that paste again for the future and you can bash out a banging Massaman in like, half hour.)

So you want to know what some of those ingredients are, and where to find them, or find good substitutes? Absolutely, I'll steer you through it. Luckily, most of the ingredients you are guaranteed to find in a local Thai store, and if you don't have one, I've found the international section of most big supermarkets to have most of what I need. Something that is also worth note; the Massaman is a Thai curry, but has its roots in Indian and even Middle Eastern cuisine because of their ties to Islam, so if you find yourself at a loss in the Thai section of the store, head over to the Indian side and you may well find what you need.

Groundnut Oil - Just peanut oil, don't think too hard. If you have canola oil or vegetable oil, that's fine too, but peanut oil is preferred because of its peanut flavor. And this curry is big on peanuts.

Lime Leaves - They may also be sold as kaffir lime leaves, or makrut. Very strong aroma and citrus flavour. One substitute if you cannot find these are bay leaves. The only thing there is you wouldn't get that nice citrus hit. You could also use lemon and/or lime zest instead, or, if you're like me, do both - why the fuck not? Just remember to take out the leaves before serving - you do not want to bite into that.

Another quick note on that - I have read, and used, that for one lime leaf, you would use 1.5 tsp zest. I've done it, works great.

Galangal - Looks a bit like ginger, is not ginger, but can be substituted with ginger. It's definitely not ideal because they are pretty - well - very different in flavour. Galangal is earthy, kinda piney, and very sharp in citrusy notes, which is why it is ideal for Massaman. Ginger is obviously pungent and spicy. I'm not expert (shocker), but if you can't find galangal, just use the same quantity of ginger. I think that's playing it safe.

Palm sugar - Can be hard to find, and sometimes expensive. I hear the best substitute is maple sugar, but I have always substituted with a dark brown sugar (demerara) and it's still fire.

Bird's Eye Chillies - Use your common sense on this one. Bird's Eyes are pretty hot, but obviously with all the coconut and citrus involved, its spice is eased. We all know our own spice levels. I like it hotter, so I throw in a few more chillies. I have also used Jalapeno before too (I know, sacrilege!) and it's fine. You just want that kick at the end of the day.

Chicken Breast - I'm not putting this here because I think you'll struggle to find it. I just want to say that firstly, use whatever protein you like. If you don't eat meat, throw in more potato, add sweet potato, tofu, it's all good. If you do want to go the chicken root, use thighs. Trust me. When you fry the meat and then stew it in a curry like this, chicken breast is very easy to overcook and become dry. Use thighs, and that chicken will stay beautifully tender.

Thai Basil - I fucking love this ingredient. Yes, you could use your standard basil as a substitute but it is definitely NOT the same. I urge you to try and get Thai Basil. If you have tried, then I forgive you. Thai Basil has a very noticeable smell of anise, whereas your italian basil is, well, basil, pesto, whatever. If you have to use regular basil, maybe throw in another half a star anise to make up for it.

Coconut Milk - The recipe calls for 200ml, or half a can. Double it. I did it by accident once, and have never gone back. I missed the spice a little, so the next time, I added more chillies. But that extra rich creaminess is to die for. Some people have accidents and create penicillin. Me - I make a slightly more delicious, potentially bastardized curry. We all do our bit.

So that's the curry. I'm sure you're all wondering where the Brussel Sprout recipe is. Well, it's not on there. Because the Brussel Sprouts are my addition. That's right, I'm a fucking culinary wizard, baby. Or I've fucked all the previous good work up. I dunno. In our house, we love sprouts. So if you do too, here's what I did. If you don't want the sprouts, then fuck off, I've got nothing else for you, why are you here?

I don't measure anything here. Probably, definitely, should. But, it's just a side dish, we're busy with the main meal, we can eyeball this, alright? So, grab a mixing bowl, throw in your halved sprouts, and add sesame oil, peanut oil, soy sauce, sesame seeds, garlic powder, salt, pepper, and lemon juice. Give them a toss (oi oi), throw them on a baking tray, bake them at anywhere between 400 & 425 F, and keep an eye on them so they don't burn, you tit. But about 25-30 mins. I know, my attention to detail is what really separates me from other amateur chefs. You're just gonna have to go with your gut, but it's fairly common sense. Just add enough of all the things so the sprouts are evenly coated and not over seasoned, and when you roast them, make sure they're crispy on the outside, soft on the inside, but not fucking burnt. Don't act like it's fucking rocket science.

So they you are. This is now something I cook probably once a month, which is frequent in my house. Again, chop, change, customize, follow your palate, use your imagination and creativity, run away with it and have a fucking blast. This is a really satisfying meal when you know what it took to make. You did this, from scratch. Look at what you created from the rawest ingredients. You made your own paste, you absolute legend. And tell me, wasn't it worth it? I know it was, ya wee stunner!